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I Almost Peed My Pants Laughing At These 36 Unhinged Facebook Marketplace Finds
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I like to write about spooky stuff, including *EEK* politics, as well as various lifestyle and pop culture topics. "I joined this subreddit to share this." "This is the next best thing from toe socks."—u/flipside438 "They can just slide that back into the back of that storage building."—u/txkwatch "I don't think that's a cake topper, looks more like a bottom..."—@CournoyerG "Is that what they're calling it these days?"—u/IrelandAutism13 "Thought this belonged here: Fly Harness." "It says the mileage is 0, but it’s definitely had some usage."—u/Impossible_Month1718 "Holy shit, just what I was looking for!!" "I can see some butterfly dust mixed in from here. Nice try, scammer."—u/carrynarcan "'I wouldn’t call it writer’s block…more of a hibernation.'"—@LittleBigRing "'Charming,' 'drenched.' So much to unpack in so little text."—u/Practical_Web_9605 "The blood of its enemies."—u/Euphoric-Rice-3830 "I wish I didn't know about this."—@NJMomforinpers1 "Putin deez nutz in ya mouth."—[deleted] "'Don't worry, I'm not wasting precious gloves. I reuse the same one.'"—u/MorbidRealities "Coke spilled, alright. Right out of their asshole."—u/Honda_TypeR "Yeah, but like the experience of watching this guy hot-glue your remotes together is worth the ten dollars."—u/camerasoftwhere "When it’s time to bury my ex... 🤡🤡"—u/Ordinary_Nobody_4527 "Really needs a lighted, rotating disco ball at the top."—u/classless_classic "That would get in the way of kicking legs."—u/andrewbud420 "What am I looking at? Where's the face?" "Yeah, that’ll help sell the wig."—u/McTrip "Gonna aura farm at a funeral in this."—@obviousmoonman "Hank Hill Propane Tank Yard Art – Approx. 4’ Tall x 1’ Wide ($75)." "'Goddamnit, Bobby, is this avail-a-bull?'"—@FL0RlDAB0Y "I couldn't stop laughing at this description." "'No screaming included.' Damn, and I was actually thinking I'd buy it until that last part. I mean, there are ways to DIY it, but I don't know. I think I'll just get a brand new one."—u/cursed_sporecreation “'Don’t try to lowball me. I know what I’ve got.'”—@thomasemills "I want to be buried in these."—u/Normal-Top-1985 "Someone would have to pay ME to keep that creepy thing in my house."—u/rpgnymhush "When your toddler decides to pickle Elmo, and you're like, 'That's art!'"—u/J_Jeckel "Where it belongs. Whiny boy."—u/Snap-Pop-Nap "Why would someone give this away? 🤯"—u/Consistent-Let-549 "Forgive them, for they know not what they do."—u/WhineyLobster "Girl, the VIBRATOR on the headboard. 🤮"—u/Stimpy_LP "Vintage Pfizer Viagra promotional watch ($80)." "So that's what they mean by doing hard time."—@LancePowers20 "Thought it was the devil at first."—u/falconx123 "'I am the one who jams' ahh."—u/NaeruNai "Fucker got what was coming to him. I can finally take the deadbolt off my daughter's closet."—@NeedsBourbon "Honey, what’s wrong? You’ve barely sat on your jouch today."—u/Afraid_Platform2260 "Why would you want your kid training to pee in anything's mouth?"—u/mledonne "Yeah, I train my kids to go straight for the eyes." —u/PSK666 "Beautiful brass frog door knocker ($25)." "'Beautiful' is not the word I'd use. But it is interesting."—u/villentretenmerth88 "Pre-pandemic air is probably as potent as an SSRI at this point. I'll take it!"—u/slatervision Note: Comments have been edited for clarity.